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10:46 a.m. - 2007-02-09
Betty and Nothing Doing
Gosh, it�s been a slow news time for the BigHeads. Nothing happening except that we�re trying to keep warm. Today it�s 15 degrees below normal, a whopping 17 degrees outside. I�m wearing so many layers that I could mix and match at least 3 different outfits if I took it all off. Thank God Ed and I cut and stacked about 3 ricks of wood a couple of weeks ago just before the latest Alberta Clipper blew through our fair state to freeze us all to death. Ah, here�s a fun fact for all my northern friends. Schools were on a 1 and 2 hour delay last week due to the cold temperatures. You laugh at us when we get into a frenzy over a few snowflakes so I guess you�ll really roll over that one. Poor little Kentucky mountain kids, not enough sense to wear pants while they�re waiting for the bus.

I�m starting to get the squee over our trip to Green Bay in 3 weeks. I�m taking Thursday off to pack and get the car loaded. I�ll get Ed early at work then we�ll head toward Chicago or maybe Milwaukee if we get an early enough start. Last year we toured the Harley Davidson plant and the Jelly Belly warehouse. I think I want to do the Jelly Belly again just so we can buy some cheap candies at the gift shop. They give you some free samples, too, at the end of the tour. I�d really like to go to the big outlet mall just outside of Milwaukee. I can�t remember what it�s called, but you can see it from the highway and it�s huge. A couple of other Weetaconers know what I�m talking about, great shopping, eh? That�ll be a no-go, though, because Ed just doesn�t appreciate a lengthy perusal of shoe stores, matching handbags or clothing beyond the basics of what is needed for modesty and warmth. He�s such a guy sometimes.

I�ve been trying to pull together appropriate outfits for all the GB activities. I have some new jeans and a belt for the Bad Bar but I can�t decide how far to dive into bar slut with the top. Should I go with sparkles and cleavage, sheer halter-top and cleavage or beaded cami and cleavage? I think the cleavage part is pretty much a given but really, how far should a forty-something woman go? At what point do my clothes become offensive? When do they start referring to me as Southern White-Trash? Hopefully my Polliwog Police will step in. They are pretty vocal when it comes to my life and clothing choices. They think it�s embarrassing that I spend a drunken weekend every winter in Wisconsin, dancing in bar windows and flashing my boobage but really, no one knows about it. Except for Ed and 30 other Weetacon attendees and the other Bad Bar patrons and anyone viewing pictures posted on Flickr Photos. Seriously though, no one else knows about my secret 3 day yearly fling. Except for the folks I eat lunch with and the members of my weight loss support group and select members of my extended family. No one else, though. I�m positive, I think.

OK, I�m going back to work now. Thank God no one is around today. I woke up this morning with a giant zit on my chin and no time for doing hair and make-up. Au-natural Betty is not a pretty sight. Be glad you�re not here.

 

 

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